I think I died a long time ago.
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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