North Korea, Best Korea!
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I wish there were birth control emojis
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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