i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize