o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
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