I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize
