Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
