ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
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