I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Randomize
