doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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