smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
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