So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Randomize
