Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
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