It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
