Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
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