ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
