I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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