PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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