I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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