Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize