why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
FUCK WHALES
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