In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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