I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Randomize
