seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
third nipple confirmed
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
