I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize