I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
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