I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
