I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize