just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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