We're like a lot better than the average bears
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
