And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
