Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
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Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
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I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
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