i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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