sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
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