Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize
