My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
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