Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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