Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
