i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
