dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Randomize
