No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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