I just cut my nipple shaving
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
When did angry sex become our thing?
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
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