can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize
