Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize