You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
