On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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