TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
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