just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
