I love black thongs
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Randomize
