Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
