I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
You were trust falling into bushes
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Randomize
