Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
So many bounce houses so little time
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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